I'm a big kid now!
by ron-freak
Summary: Hermionie decides its time to introduce Harry and Ron to a NEW game!! ;) as Harry, Ron and Hermionie start to play more people decide to join read and see who!!


Hermionie decides its time to introduce Harry and Ron to a NEW game!! ;) as Harry, Ron and Hermionie start to play more people decide to join read and see who!!  
  
Chapter 1  
  
Scene: Harry and Ron are sitting in the Great Hall trying to kill and ant. Hermionie enters the scene...  
  
Hermionie: hey guys!!!...um.what are u guys looking at?  
  
Harry and Ron sit there giggling and poking the table.  
  
Harry: can't you see woman! Were trying to kill the vermin that has entered our territory!!  
  
Ron: tee hee!! Look Hermionie the little tiny..  
  
Ron pulls out a dictionary and flips the pages in deep concentration.  
  
ANT!! Yea its an ant.thank goodness its not a spider!!  
  
Harry and Hermionie stare at Ron for a while  
  
What?  
  
Harry goes back to killing the ant  
  
Hermionie: What do you think your trying to do??  
  
Ron: gee Hermionie even I know that one!! Stupid he is trying to kill the ant!!  
  
Hermionie: do you guys want to sit here and kill the ant or do you want to do something??  
  
Harry: I rather kill the ant unless you have something better for us to do  
  
Harry gave a mischievous smile. Hermionie ignoring the smile said lets play Monopoly!!  
  
Ron: what the- I mean what is Monopoly??  
  
Harry: its obviously a game you fag  
  
A/N: yea I know "fag" is such a strong word! lol anyway plz submit a review!! I really want to know what ppl think of my FIRST story!!  
  
Hermionie: so do you want to play??  
  
Harry and Ron: OKAY!!  
  
Chapter 2  
  
Scene: Right outside the Quidditch field on the grass  
  
Hermionie: you two read the game rules while I set up the board.  
  
Ron: but I don't wanna!!  
  
Hermionie: stop being such a big baby...you know what how bout Harry read Ron the rules out loud.  
  
Harry: AW CRUD WHY ME!!  
  
Hermionie glares at Harry  
  
Harry: Fine fine!!  
  
While Harry is reading the rules out loud Lupin, and Sirius come  
  
Sirius: what ya guys doing?  
  
Ron: playing Monopoly..*thinks for sometime* wanna play??  
  
Lupin: sure it sounds fun  
  
Lupin and Sirius sit down mean while Draco, Lavender and Colin walk by  
  
Draco: well well well if it isn't potty, weasel and granger  
  
Ron: how come you called Harry potty and me weasel but you just called Hermionie by her last name today its usually *immatating Draco* Oh look it's the mudblood!!  
  
Draco: *pauses for a moment* I dunno never thought about that  
  
All stare at each other ( yea I know to much staring)  
  
Colin: so what are u guys doing??  
  
Lupin: playing Monopoly  
  
Lavender: CAN WE PLAY!!!.I mean can I play?  
  
Colin: yea can I play too? *staring at Lavender like she's gone mad*  
  
All wait for Draco to ask  
  
Draco: awwwww fine GOD DAMN IT!! I mean can I play *calming himself down*  
  
Hermionie: do you think we should let him play?  
  
All: yea sure..whatever..*grumble*  
  
Harry finishes the rules and explains to everyone  
  
Hermionie: all right every one who wants to be whom?  
  
Harry: Oh!! Oh!!! Gimmie the ship!! Weeeeeee I want the pretty boat!!!  
  
Harry grabs the ship  
  
Ron: Gimmie the shoe!!  
  
Sirius: no u fool I want the shoe!!  
  
Ron: back off its mine!!  
  
Sirius and Ron start making faces and the name calling begins  
  
Ron: oh yea well your just a big baby who wont give the shoe to the person who it really belongs to!!  
  
Sirius: so your just a freak who sucks his thumb!!  
  
Ron: Harry!! I told you not to tell anyone!!!  
  
Harry: sorry he IS my godfather after all.  
  
Ron: *whimpering* well.. well.your just a big fat flabbergash!! With no life!!  
  
Every one stops what their doing and pauses then burst out laughing  
  
Lupin: what the he- I mean what in the world did that mean??  
  
Draco: I don't know but it was hella funny!!  
  
Hermionie: wow!! Something new!! Draco said Ron was funny!!  
  
Draco: NO I DIDN'T I just meant that he is funny in his usual stupid way!!  
  
Sirius: sure u did.  
  
Draco: I DIDN'T THINK RON WAS FUNNI IN A NICE WAY!!  
  
Lupin: calm down old lad!! He was just joking.weren't you Sirius?  
  
Sirius: huh?  
  
Ron: THE SHOE IS MINE U FEIND!!!!  
  
Sirius: u know what I don't care anymore!! You can have the stupid shoe!! Ill just be the little cute doggy!!  
  
Lupin: good choice Sirius hahah  
  
Sirius: either your calling me a dog as in a perv or you said good choice cuz I can turn into a dog.. it better be the second one!!  
  
Lupin: well what do you think padfoot?  
  
Draco: okay ill just be the thimble  
  
Lavender: ill be the cute little car it matches my nails!!  
  
Sirius: Lavender.you really need a hobby!  
  
Lavender: I already have one.. its..its..uhhh.wait I know this one-  
  
Lupin: its okay don't stress your brain..*whispers* or what's left of it  
  
Colin: I'm the cannon!! YAY go cannons go cannons!!  
  
Hermionie: this isn't Quidditch!! Aaaaaaaannnnnnnd ill be the top hat..  
  
Lupin: well since I AM THE OLDEST AND WISEST *Sirius throws his game piece at Lupin's head* OW!! Anyway I guess I am stuck being the iron. *Frowns*  
  
A/N: tee hee! lol I've always wanted to throw something at Lupin!! lol no offense to all you Lupin lovers!! But I haven't wanted to throw it at him in a bad way!  
  
Harry: Its okay Lupin next time you can be something else..unless...I STEAL THE WHOLE SET AND THREATEN TO DESTROY IT!! MUHAWHAHWHAH!! But I doubt I'd do something like THAT!!  
  
Everyone gives Harry "the look"  
  
Chapter 3  
  
Scene: still in front of the Quidditch field and in the middle of the game until.  
  
Everyone is now fighting for the property known as "the boardwalk"  
  
Ron: its mine you fag!!  
  
Sirius: who are u calling a fag you..you...meanie butt!!  
  
Ron: actually I was calling all you people who want MY property!! And I'm certainly not a menie butt!! You.pie stealer!!  
  
Hermionie: excuse me Ron but I thought you said that the MY property is YOURS.  
  
Ron: you heard right you double prat!! HEY!!  
  
Lupin: now lets not get too carried away.after all it's just a game and I think that me being the oldest and wisest in this group should get the boardwalk!!  
  
Sirius: HEY!! I am as old as you are and I just might act stupid but I know a lot of things!!  
  
Colin: you just keep telling your self that Sirius  
  
Everyone laughs and Sirius gives a rude motion towards Colin  
  
Draco: ENOUGH EVERYONE!!! Now I think I should get the boardwalk..after all I AM the most handsome and richest ones of you all-  
  
Sirius: and I have..a wand and I am NOT afraid to use it!! And I know more spells than u!!  
  
Colin: *whispers* but you have the brain of a flobberworm.. Sirius: THAT'S IT LEMMIE AT HIM!!  
  
Everyone is trying to hold Sirius back from pounding Colin.  
  
Lavender: Calm down mate!  
  
Hermionie: since when have YOU started to say "mate"  
  
Lavender blushes and lets go of Sirius..after a few minutes Sirius calms down and everyone else lets go of him as well  
  
Harry: HEY all you people!! Don't forget the one who saved your sorry butts in the first second third fourth and fifth year!!  
  
Ron: yea I HAVE been wondering who that mystery man who keeps on saving my life is??  
  
Harry smacks his head  
  
Hermionie: mystery "man"??  
  
Ron: of course! It's a mystery man!!  
  
Hermionie: how do you know it's a man?  
  
Sirius: of course everyone knows!! Every time that mystery man rescues us he leaves us a pair of dirty underwear!!  
  
Harry: so that's why my underwear is starting to disappear!!  
  
Lupin: Oh common Harry!! Just because you saved Ginny's sorry butt in the second year doesn't mean you saved us the rest of the times!!  
  
Ron: HEY!! Don't you be talking about my sister like that!!  
  
Draco: yea potty you cant have all the credit!!  
  
Dumbledore comes walking past the game  
  
Harry: Hi Voldemort!!  
  
Dumbledore: I beg your pardon?  
  
Ron: Your such a joke!! Why wont you take that costume of Dumbledore's off? It makes you look like the real Dumbledore!!  
  
Dumbledore: but I am the real Dumbledore!!  
  
Sirius: sure u are.. *nods*  
  
A/N: yea I know the whole Voldemort and Dumbledore thing..lol just live with it  
  
Dumbledore: All right.. hey can I play?  
  
Harry: no  
  
Dumbledore: how dare you say no to me.but why can't I play?  
  
Hermionie: cuz we have too many players and there aren't anymore pieces  
  
Dumbledore: well that can be arranged!! *Zaps Colin with his wand*  
  
Colin starts running towards the hospital wing screaming LOOK AT ME I AM A BUTTERFLY WITH NO HEAD!!  
  
Dumbledore: Well I think that went well  
  
Everyone staring at him besides Sirius who was giggling  
  
Lupin: well okay then you can take Colins place.i guess  
  
Chapter 3  
  
A few hours have past and still no one has taken the property formally known as " the boardwalk"  
  
Ron: fine I give up you can have the boardwalk!!  
  
Sirius: yea me too  
  
Lupin: so we have all decided that we should let Dumbledore have the boardwalk!  
  
Draco: *whispers* that's only because he threatened to expel us and blast Sirius and Lupin into oblivion *grumble* grumble*  
  
Dumbledore: well when you get to be my age you can be headmaster of Hogwarts and threaten people too!!  
  
Draco: *in a really perky way* REALLY DO YOU MEAN THAT!!  
  
Dumbledore: no  
  
A/N: don't forget to review! And if you have anymore ideas for me to write about plz tell me!!  
  
Chapter 4  
  
Draco: this is stupid!! We have been playing for hours!!  
  
Ron and Sirius: really it seemed like three minutes  
  
Harry: that's because you two have been trying to pull a prank on Dumbledore  
  
Ron and Sirius smile at Dumbledore innocently. Dumbledore smiles back in a way like he is going to kill them  
  
Ron: it wasn't me I swear!!  
  
Draco: shat up Ron!  
  
Hermionie: I am so stupid-  
  
Draco: that you are  
  
Hermionie glares at Draco  
  
What I mean to say is I shouldn't have introduced you to Monopoly!! We should have just stuck to spin the bottle!  
  
Draco: TRU DAT TRU DAT!! Yea hey Hermionie your not such a bad kisser.when you give in  
  
Hermionie slaps Draco. Everyone laughs  
  
Dumbledore: is there something in the school that's happening that I should know about?  
  
Sirius: oh common Voldemort give it up!! Remember when I caught you in the closet with Snape!!  
  
Everyone looks at Dumbledore in surprised. Then Sirius gives a weak laugh  
  
Dumbledore: SIRIUS!! WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU MAKE SUCH A NASTY ROUMER ABOUT ME!? And for the last time I am not Voldemort!!  
  
Sirius: but I really did-  
  
Dumbledore: SHADDUP!! Now what all of you have head is not true!! Got it?  
  
A/N: omg I am sorry I had no idea who to put Dumbledore with so the only person I could think of was Snape! lol sorry to all you Dumbledore fans (if there are any out there)  
  
Chapter 5  
  
Snape walks by with Cho  
  
Cho: hi! What are you doing Harry?  
  
Hermionie: we were just-  
  
Cho: excuse me HER-MI-O-NI-E but did I ask YOU??  
  
Hermionie: well no but-  
  
Cho: tell me Harry darling?  
  
Ron: *whispers* darling?? Harry does she really call you darling?  
  
Sirius: HAHAHAHHAHAHAH  
  
Harry: *whispers* not that I remember-  
  
Cho: WELL TELL ME HARRY!!  
  
Harry: were playing Monopoly  
  
Snape: how utterly disgusting!! What are you doing here Malfoy? I expected more from you!!  
  
Draco: aw can it you rotten piece of- oh never mind!! Can't I play in piece?!  
  
Lupin: well so far we haven't been playing in piece so yes you can  
  
Snape and Malfoy stare at Lupin for a while  
  
Dumbledore: would you like to play?  
  
Snape: of course not!!  
  
Cho: OKAY!! But only if I can sit next to Harry!!  
  
Cho pusses over Ron and sits next to Harry. Hermionie turns red in jealousy.  
  
Ron: don't worry Hermionie Harry still fancies you!  
  
Hermionie and Harry blush. Cho glares across the game board at Hermionie  
  
A/N: ha I just had to put Cho and Snape in the story well Snape at least  
  
~*Meanwhile*~  
  
Draco: *whispers to Hermionie* Hey Granger!!  
  
Hermionie: what  
  
Draco: wanna make Harry jealous of me and you?  
  
Hermionie: why would I want to do something like that?  
  
Draco: gee I dunno cuz Cho is cuddling with Harry to make you jealous?  
  
Hermionie looks across the game board and sees Cho trying to sit on Harry's lap and Harry actually enjoying it!  
  
Hermionie thinks for a minute  
  
Hermionie: alright what do I do?  
  
Draco smirks then whispers something into her ear. Hermionie slaps Draco  
  
Sirius: *in a sing song manner* HAHA Draco got smacked! Draco got smacked!  
  
Draco: shaddup you frigging idiot!  
  
Dumbledore: * imitating Sirius* HAHA Draco got smacked! Draco got smacked!  
  
Draco: I'm leaving!!  
  
Draco walks off  
  
Lupin: well now Snape can play.hey where is he anyway?  
  
A few feet away the group spots Snape standing next to a tree and apparently talking to it.. after a few minutes he gave it a hug  
  
Dumbledore: HA!! Sirius see I told you Snape does have a soft side..Gimmie my 100 galleons!!  
  
Harry: wow I didn't know Snape was a nature freak  
  
Cho: All right if Harry calls him a nature freak.from now on he is known to me as " NATURE FREAKISH MAN WHO HAS NO LIFE"  
  
Everyone stares at Cho for a minute. Suddenly Lupin screams!!  
  
Hermionie: what is it now you old goat!! A/N: I know the whole goat thing kinda lame  
  
Lupin: Ch-ch-ch  
  
Ron: spit it out old man!  
  
Sirius spits at Ron  
  
Ron: EW FAG GERMS!! GET IT OFF ME!!!  
  
Lupin: AHHHHHHH CHO IS ACTUALLY A MARY-SUE!!!  
  
Cho: how can you accuse me for something so vile? You're so hurtful!  
  
Hermionie: how can you be so sure that Cho is really a Mary-sue?  
  
Lupin: cuz of this!  
  
Lupin then rips off the Mary-sues mask  
  
Harry: *gasp*  
  
Ron: *double gasp*  
  
Hermionie: * triple gasp*  
  
Mary-sue: please stop gasping!!  
  
All except Harry and Ron: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!  
  
Mary-sue: why is everyone screaming?  
  
Suddenly a stampede of boys including Draco and Colin come running by to get a "closer" look on the radiant Mary-sue. Sadly the only thing Colin could get out of his mouth was "I AM A BUTTERFLY WITH NO HEAD" Harry and Ron faint because of the Mary-sues melodious voice was so heavenly it made them faint (A/N: yea I know sickening but yet I had no idea what I should write! lol)  
  
Hermionie: no not Harry!  
  
Lupin: what about Ron?  
  
Hermionie: oh yea.. and Ron too  
  
Sirius: anyway.AHHHHHHHHH IT'S A MARY-SUE!! GOD HELP US ALL!!!!!!  
  
Lupin is starts to run away  
  
Chapter 6  
  
Harry awakens  
  
A/N: don't forget to review!  
  
Sirius: NO DON'T RUN!! I-I-I-LOVE YOU!!  
  
Everyone stares at Sirius for a moment  
  
Sirius: well I had to say SOMETHING!!  
  
Harry: omg I had a wonderful dream that we were playing Monopoly and Cho came by and it was actually a Mary-sue  
  
Hermionie: uhhh sorry to beak it to you but-  
  
Harry: she's right behind me isn't she?  
  
Sirius: ill stop her! AVERA KEDEVRA!!  
  
Sirius's fails and runs away crying  
  
Sirius: why can't I kill anyone!!  
  
Snape walks by  
  
Snape: oh you again  
  
In her sweet honey like voice Mary-sue says, " What's wrong my dear pumpkin?"  
  
Hermionie: pumpkin? I thought you had a thing for Harry?  
  
Mary-sue: of course I do!! He is the one I worship an love.. and if he doesn't love me then.. I WILL MAKE HIM!!  
  
Snape: well this is all rubbish!  
  
Harry says in a monotonous tone " I love you my dear Mary-sue, will you marry me? I worship you forever and always" Mary-sue responds with an even more cheery voice " of course my one and only love!!"  
  
Hermionie: this sickens me! AVERA KEDAVERA!!  
  
Suddenly the beam coming from Hermionie's wand bounces off Mary-sue and hits Snape! Snape falls to the floor uttering his last words " I-will-get- you-for-this-HERMIONIE!!  
  
Ron regains his conscious  
  
Ron: huh? Did something happen when I was asleep?  
  
Hermionie: wh-wh-wh- why did it bounce off?!!  
  
Mary-sue: of course silly I cannot be destroyed by anybody! Tee hee!!  
  
Ron: BLOODY HELL it's a sue!! AHHHHHH.i mean that laughing is-is-is so heavenly!!  
  
Hermionie: shaddup Ron! And lemmie think!  
  
Ron is now hysterically crying  
  
Ron: *now sobbing* now I know why Harry doesn't like you back.its because your so mean!  
  
Lavender: SHADDUP RON!! I am known as the school prissy and do you see me crying? No!  
  
Hermionie: thank-you.I think?  
  
Lavender starts to file her nails. Hermionie is starting to think " what should I do how do I destroy this horrid creature from my Harry?)  
  
Lavender: do you want to destroy the Mary-sue and get Harry back?  
  
Hermionie flinches  
  
Hermionie: I doubt YOU have a plan Chapter 7  
  
Lavender: I do and I will do it myself god damn it! I mean I think I am capable of destroying the evils sue!  
  
Lavender then throws her nail file at the sue and she catches it while at the same time letting go of Harry's lips and starts to file her nails while Harry and Ron stare at her. Then Lavender grabs her boom box which appears out of no where and plays loud rock music  
  
Mary-sue: AHHHHHHH MAKE IT STOP!!!  
  
The Mary-sue dissolves and Harry and Ron have come out of her spell  
  
Harry: why are my lips wet? Ron: why was I drooling?  
  
Hermionie smiles and waltz up to Harry then gives him a "death defying kiss" for three minutes the onlookers watch them soon (A/N: lol I couldn't resist I just had to! lol) Ron's mouth drops as he watches Hermionie and Harry smooching (A/N: lol I know smooching? Its odd but I had no other "appropriate" word) after Hermionie and Harry let go, Hermionie ran back to the castle  
  
Ron: wow mate I didn't think she liked you THAT much!  
  
Harry: yea I know * brushes the hair out of his eyes then sighs*  
  
Ron: wow today's adventure was very exciting! I wonder where Voldemort went and why didn't he save us from Mary-sue?  
  
Harry: dunno.and why would Voldemort want to save us? His whole purpose in life is to kill me!  
  
Ron: remember after that food fight we had on that picnic yesterday when he first wore that stupid Dumbledore costume?  
  
Harry: yea  
  
Ron: well I guess you didn't remember the part after it when he said that he forgave you and said that you can live for a week until he starts to hunt you down again!  
  
Harry: oh yea!  
  
Ron and Harry look around and in a short period find "Voldemort" sleeping next to them! Not only that he was sucking his thumb and in this other hand had a stuffed phoenix! (A/N: that is sooooo like Dumbledore lol)  
  
Ron: I guess it was too much for him  
  
Harry: what are we going to do about the game board?  
  
Ron: dunno lets just leave it  
  
Harry: okay  
  
Chapter 8  
  
Suddenly a couple of girls walk by! One with waste length blonde hair something like a Mary-sue but quite not exact and the other one with short hair that was Black but kept changing color each time she took a step!  
  
Harry: hello  
  
Ron: yea hi.I think  
  
One girl begin to giggle  
  
Ron: what did I do now?  
  
Harry thinks to himself " and he wonders why the ladies never ask him out"  
  
Girl #1: like hieee!!  
  
Ron whispers to Harry " well she is a perky one"  
  
Girl#2: yea what ever hi..Brittany can we get this over with pu-lese!!!  
  
Brittany looks at Harry in a dazed manner and starts drooling  
  
Brittany: huh? What? Oh yea um..tee hee.Harry..uhhh  
  
Harry: yup that's my name  
  
Brittany giggles  
  
Girl #2: BRITTANY GET IT OVER WITH.OH FINE ILL JUST DO IT FOR YOU!! HARRY SHE WANTS TO GO STEADY WITH YOU!!  
  
Harry and Ron stare at the two girls in amazement. Ron nudges Harry and says " I dunno mate remember what happened a few minutes ago" Harry whispers back " what has us finding Dumbledore asleep got to do with me finding a perky girlfriend?"  
  
Ron: no you imbecile! You just kissed Hermionie for like three minutes!!  
  
Harry: oh that!  
  
Ron: well you don't want to break her heart do you?  
  
Harry: *thinks for a moment* SURE I DO!! Ron smacks forehead then whispers to himself " what an idiot!"  
  
Harry says to Brittany " sure lets get started under that tree over there" Brittany giggles and walks off with Harry to the tree (A/N: I know kinda sick but I had to have an ending)  
  
Ron: so..hi? um.what's your name?  
  
Girl #2: oh me..my name is Ginger.yours?  
  
Ron started to look proud as he said his name "of course I am the one the only RON!!"  
  
Ginger: riiiiiight.okay  
  
Ron thinks to himself " listen Ron your buddy over there has a girlfriend.why don't you just ask Ginger and get over with it.besides what's the worst that can happen?"  
  
Ron: um.hey Ginger wanna be my girlfriend  
  
Ginger: sure.so  
  
Ron: common!  
  
Ron and Ginger walk off into the castle while the sun set behind them..  
  
(A/N: oh I just love happy endings!! lol well don't forget to review!!) 


End file.
